Yesterday I felt great. It was warm in sunny North Carolina. Not a hint of rain in sight. I worked all day, cooked a lemon cake, a load of laundry and never once did I catch a glimpse of death staring over my shoulder. I never once consciously thought about the things I did during my day. I lived without moments of regret.
Today I typed a word (I type, that’s my job), got up, got a cup of coffee, came back and the word was an entirely different word. I know that seems crazy, but I’m being sincere. I typed SCLEROTIC and when I came back and sat down, SCAPHOLUNATE was looking at me from the page. I don’t remember typing that word. Not at all. I mean, I remember typing S-C and nothing after that but I knew the word I had been asked to type was SCLEROTIC.
So I decided maybe I should write these things down and let you, the rest of the human race watch me and well, I hope someone out there will notice if I completely lose my mind.
My grandmother developed dementia and I am afraid that I will not see it coming when or if it comes for me. Does this make sense? I am 51 years old, I am an American citizen, I am gay, I am a woman, I am a transcriptionist, and I am a mother. If you can relate to any of this, if you can help me remember who I am, it would be greatly appreciated. I know nothing of keeping a blog; I only hope that this will help someone, if only myself because I matter, I count, I am someone.